{"id":115,"date":"2009-04-16T16:52:19","date_gmt":"2009-04-16T20:52:19","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.auroraforce.org\/blog\/?p=115"},"modified":"2009-04-16T16:52:19","modified_gmt":"2009-04-16T20:52:19","slug":"vong-war-annals-finding-allies-in-strange-places-4162009","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.auroraforce.org\/blog\/?p=115","title":{"rendered":"Vong War Annals – “Finding allies in strange places” 4.16.2009"},"content":{"rendered":"

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Tag Rendar\u2019s office\u2014her new office, as the old was still occupied by the absent Alek Cannelle, Chief of Intelligence for Sector 27\u2014had begun to take on the personality, slowly but surely, of its occupant.\u00a0 The cabinets slowly had begun to be filled again with pictures, mementos\u2014an old flight helmet, holos of various stripes, a crystal bar set in one corner cabinet.\u00a0 A few blank pages of\u2026paper?…were still scattered across the floor, half under furniture.\u00a0 Tag didn\u2019t seem to notice their presence as she waved for Les to take a seat, sinking down into the chair behind the desk.
\n\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cHear you hit a rough patch the past couple weeks, huh?\u201d
\n\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Les wondered why he felt so suddenly shy. He shifted uncomfortably in the chair. \u201cI guess so.\u201d He coughed to clear his throat.
\n\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Tag smiled faintly at the boy.\u00a0 \u201cI don\u2019t bite, Les.\u00a0 It\u2019s all right.\u00a0 You were angry.\u00a0 Things\u2026happen when you get angry.\u201d\u00a0 She leaned back in her chair, steepling her fingers.\u00a0 \u201cThere\u2019s a dirty little secret most Jedi won\u2019t tell you, y\u2019know.\u00a0 We\u2019ve all tasted the Dark Side at some point or another.\u00a0 It\u2019s a rite of passage, almost.\u00a0 It\u2019s where you go from here that\u2019s what really matters.\u00a0 What you do with the rest of your days in this existence.\u00a0 The Force forgives more easily than people do, I\u2019m afraid\u2026that\u2019s the harsh reality of the situation.\u00a0 But even a Sith Lord who finds redemption is eventually called home to become one with the Force, at the end.\u201d
\n\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 He looked away so she wouldn\u2019t catch the hint of the tears that were trying to form behind his eyes. \u201cI didn\u2019t think there was anyone who understood.\u201d He shook his head. \u201cI\u2019m not even sure I do. I\u2019m so confused.\u201d He opened his mouth, closed it again, in his debate over confessing that sometimes it felt to him that he\u2019d done the right thing and still burned with lingering anger towards his former master; while at other times he felt he\u2019d gone so far wrong that he felt no hope.
\n\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cBeing confused is part of learning, kiddo.\u201d\u00a0 Tag leaned forward, against her desk, watching him for a few long moments.\u00a0 \u201cYou\u2019re young.\u00a0 You\u2019re at a time in your life when you feel things more keenly than someone who\u2019s been walking a Jedi\u2019s path for a long while.\u00a0 Every master who forgets what it was like to be a student\u2026well.\u00a0 Let\u2019s just say that I\u2019m glad I\u2019ve never forgotten.\u201d\u00a0 She looked down at her hands for a moment.\u00a0 \u201cI was abandoned by my master, too, you know.\u201d
\n\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Les\u2019 eyes snapped up to look at her in surprise. \u201cYou were?\u201d
\n\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 She nodded slowly.\u00a0 \u201cI was about your age, still on Corellia.\u00a0 He was my uncle, after a fashion.\u00a0 Mikhail Bridger.\u00a0 Some would say he was Fallen from the get-go, others\u2026\u201d\u00a0 She shrugged slightly.\u00a0 \u201cThey were dark times.\u00a0 I don\u2019t know that either Nylan or I were ready to be on our own\u2026but sometimes, the galaxy chooses.\u00a0 When Alderaan died\u2026I lost my Master.\u201d
\n\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Les was rivited, his gaze never leaving her face as she told her story. \u201cI\u2019m sorry to hear it.\u201d He paused for a moment before asking, \u201cWhat did you do then?\u201d
\n\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 She smiled slightly, making eye contact, if only briefly.\u00a0 \u201cWe ran.\u00a0 Got off Corellia with some of the folks who worked for my master\u2014he ran a bar, of all things, on Treasure Ship Row\u2014and hooked up with the Alliance at Yavin IV.\u00a0 You know what happened there, right?\u201d
\n\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 He nodded.
\n\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 She nodded in response.\u00a0 \u201cI thought so.\u00a0 It\u2019s hard, to continue to sort out what you\u2019re supposed to do, how you\u2019re supposed to be on your own.\u00a0 Most of us who survived those days figured out a lot by ourselves and in turn helped those who were discovered with abilities later.\u201d\u00a0 She smiled wryly.\u00a0 \u201cSkywalker wasn\u2019t the only one on the lookout in those days.\u201d\u00a0 She stood up slowly, stretching, turning toward the one-way window that had a view of the tarmac.\u00a0 The sun was starting to peek through stormclouds.\u00a0 \u201cMy first real brush with the Dark Side came after I started working for Alliance Intelligence.\u00a0 It was eight, maybe ten months or so after Yavin.\u00a0 They sent me to Coruscant.\u201d
\n\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cYou\u2019ve had a…lot of adventures,\u201d he said, wondering if she, too, had ever, in all her wanderings through the galaxy, danced with the Dark Side as he had.
\n\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 She seemed to sense his question, though she didn\u2019t turn to face him.\u00a0 \u201cA few.\u00a0 That one\u2026was probably the deepest cover I\u2019ve ever experienced.\u201d\u00a0 She crossed her arms, squeezing them tightly across her chest.\u00a0 \u201cI killed one of the Emperor\u2019s Hands.\u00a0 And then I became her.\u201d
\n\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Les\u2019 eyes grew wide. \u201cYou\u2019re kidding!\u201d he exclaimed without thinking.
\n\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Her laugh was humorless.\u00a0 \u201cI wish I was.\u201d\u00a0 She glanced over her shoulder at him.\u00a0 \u201cHer name was Link Shaner…and the Empire never found out that I killed her.\u00a0 I kept the identity for almost ten years, even after the Emperor was dead.\u201d
\n\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cWow.\u201d He grinned in open admiration. \u201cYou\u2019re good!\u201d
\n\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cI learned from the best.\u201d\u00a0 She turned back toward the window.\u00a0 \u201cBut that\u2026cover\u2026that came at a price.\u00a0 One that was almost too dear to pay.\u201d\u00a0 Tag brushed her hair out of her face.\u00a0 \u201cWhen I killed her, she\u2026somehow became a part of me.\u00a0 She came to\u2026symbolize and personify my own struggle with the Dark Side.\u201d\u00a0 She turned slowly, gripping the back of her chair.\u00a0 \u201cYou can tread the line, sometimes\u2026sometimes\u2026safely tap your darker emotions, your more\u2026intense emotions to do amazing things\u2014I\u2019ve seen it done\u2014but there\u2019s always a risk involved.\u00a0 Always.\u00a0 I walked the razor\u2019s edge for too long and paid the price.\u201d\u00a0 She picked up a holo, slowly turning it around and handing it to him.\u00a0 \u201cYou know who that is, right?\u201d
\n\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 He studied the holo, then looked back up to her and answered, \u201cRobert…and his sister, um….\u201d
\n\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cRachel,\u201d she supplied, unbuttoning her uniform jacket.\u00a0 \u201cDuring my escape from that operation, I forgot who I really was.\u00a0 I got cocky.\u00a0 I\u2026thought that giving an Imperial Royal Guard an order would work, even though I didn\u2019t look or sound like Link Shaner at the time.\u201d\u00a0 She wrestled the jacket open.\u00a0 \u201cIt almost killed me.\u201d\u00a0 She pulled aside the strap of the tank top she wore beneath the jacket, displaying an old, faded scar that looked deep\u2014deeper than one bacta would have left her with.\u00a0 \u201cThe point of my story, Les, is that you have to remember who you are, regardless of anything else. \u00a0Whether you\u2019re tapping one side or the other, or both at once\u2026you have to maintain a hold of who you are at your core, or it\u2019s going to get you killed.\u00a0 Robert and I had both lost ourselves at that point, and if not for Jaq\u2019s intervention\u2026\u201d\u00a0 Her voice hitched a moment.\u00a0 She took a deep breath and exhaled.\u00a0 \u201cIf not for Colonel Pellman\u2019s intervention, we wouldn\u2019t be having this conversation and I daresay you might not even exist<\/em>.\u201d
\n\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Les fell into the silence that followed, thinking about what he\u2019d just heard. This was unlike anything he\u2019d heard from a Jedi. \u201cWhat…what do you mean…I might not even exist?\u201d he asked at last.
\n\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Tag smiled weakly.\u00a0 \u201cBecause everything is connected, Les.\u00a0 If I had died that day, I never would have gone back to Corellia a few years later on a recruiting drive.\u00a0 Indiana Bridger probably would have stayed with CorSec, never left Corellia.\u00a0 The Aurora Force never would have survived the end of the Minos debacle.\u00a0 Your mother never would have joined up, met the people she met here that made it possible for her to even conceive of marrying your father.\u00a0 Ergo<\/em>\u2026no way for you to have come into existence.\u201d\u00a0 She started buttoning her jacket up again.\u00a0 \u201cI like to think things happen for a reason.\u00a0 I can\u2019t know for certain\u2014maybe one of our more clairvoyant Jedi could say\u2014but I like to think that\u2019s the case.\u00a0 There\u2019s too much that happens in the galaxy for there not to be reasons for it all.\u201d
\n\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 The sight of that scar stayed with him even after Tag had covered it. \u201cSo, what you\u2019re saying is…even the worst of situations can come out for good in the end.\u201d\u00a0 He wrinkled his brow. \u201cIs this one of those \u2018will of the Force\u2019 things?\u201d
\n\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 She smiled wryly.\u00a0 \u201cCould be.\u201d\u00a0 She slid slowly back into her chair.\u00a0 \u201cWe\u2019re the sum of our experiences, Les, all of us.\u00a0 We all make mistakes, some more severe and\u2026costly\u2026than others.\u00a0 What matters is that we learn from those mistakes and adjust our paths accordingly.\u201d
\n\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cI want to learn what I can from my mistakes,\u201d Les confessed. He rubbed the knuckles of his new hand with the fingers of his real one. \u201cSometimes I wonder, though…how much was a mistake,\u201d he looked down at his hands. \u201cSome of it…all of it….\u201d None of it? Would he be ever going back and forth not knowing; was he lacking in patience? He no longer felt sure of anything anymore.
\n\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cIt won\u2019t be an easy path, Les.\u201d
\n\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 His eyes held steady on his hands as he asked in a small voice, \u201cWill you help me?\u201d
\n\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cCan you look me in the eye and ask for that?\u201d
\n\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Les raised his head, complying to meet her eyes. Struggling to keep the tears back, he said, more clearly this time, \u201cHelp me.\u201d
\n\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 She came around the desk and opened her arms to hug him.\u00a0 \u201cOf course.\u00a0 But if you call me \u2018Master,\u2019 I might<\/em> have to shoot something.\u00a0 It\u2019s General, or Tag.\u201d
\n\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cYes, General Tag,\u201d he muttered as he fell into her embrace, the most comforting thing he\u2019d experienced since reading Jinx\u2019s note back at the castle a lifetime ago. \u201cThank you.\u201d\u00a0 Some might not consider it very manly to cry, but he couldn\u2019t help it.
\n\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Her arms tightened around him for a moment and she smiled weakly.\u00a0 \u201cYou\u2019re welcome, Les.\u201d\u00a0 She rubbed the boy\u2019s back and sighed, remembering for a moment the frightened, lost girl she\u2019d been two decades ago and how much she\u2019d needed what she was giving to Les Wyler now.\u00a0 Sometimes things come full-circle.\u00a0 Mysterious is the Force indeed.<\/em><\/p>\n

~ Erin and Skyy<\/p>\n

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